So I found this on Linda Ikeji’s blog. Why was I there? Times are hard. The lulz aren’t falling on my lap or appearing on my twitter timeline. On a side note, I always thought she was way hotter by the way. Like she was some model or something. Oh well, I digress.
The gist of the story is that Peter and Mercy were about to get married but their pastor Kanye’d the whole thing. Apparently, Mercy was suspected to be pregnant. How do you suspect pregnancy at the altar? Did Mercy start spitting or did the dress look a little to tight in the tummy? I know these are #JambQuestions but I think they require answers.
Mercy had already taken a pregnancy the day before but apparently that wasn’t good enough for the pastor. She had to take another one on her wedding day…at a different hospital.
Don’t they have those pregnancy kits that you find in CVS in Nigeria?
Why did she have to go all the way to a hospital?
I’ve had a bunch of scares so I know how easy this thing is. You drive to CVS. You buy the thing. Make her drink a lot of water. Send her to the bathroom and make her pee on the stick. Two minutes later, you have your answer.
See, I told you it was easy. The pregnancy test is even pointless. Why is it the church’s business? Aren’t there more important things the pastor has to handle? You know, like seeing if the day’s offering is enough to buy another Hummer.
Nigerians stay judging.